Making Friends as an Expat in Pattaya

People moving here often worry about being lonely. In my experience, making friends in Pattaya is easy, as long as you do something about it.

Is it easy to make friends here?

Absolutely. But you won't make friends sitting in your condo. You have to get out there, and there's plenty to do. Play golf, padel or tennis, or join a gym, and it's very easy. I always found it very easy.

Some of the older guys who like a drink just pick a regular bar and get chatting with the other regulars. That works too.

How did I make friends?

Through golf, at first. I was fortunate to be a good golfer, and I was a lot younger than the average person in Pattaya back then. People at the driving range could see me hitting balls, so there was natural curiosity. Every day someone would come over wanting my story: my handicap, where I was from, how old I was.

It wasn't long before I was invited to play. Who doesn't want to play with someone who might teach them something? And golf is a great way to get to know people. You drive to the course together, play for four or five hours, drive back, and quite often stop for a drink on the way home.

I also played football, and made an awful lot of friends that way. On a team of 12, 13 or 14 players, it's very easy.

What are the pitfalls?

Pattaya is a transient place. You make a friend, and through no fault of your own you lose them because they've gone back home. So you naturally become a bit more guarded about building long-term friendships.

A lot of people also come here to retire. I'm 45, but through golf I've made many friends in their 60s and 70s, and over the years I've lost a lot of them because they've passed away. That's an unfortunate part of life in this city.

Then there's the drinking culture. There are so many places to drink, and it's relatively cheap. There's also a lot of boredom. Retirees have no job to go to and often no family to look after, so if they don't keep busy with hobbies, drinking in the afternoon becomes very common.

My advice

Be open to making friends, and put yourself in as many circles as possible. Get involved in some kind of activity. It doesn't have to be strenuous or even sport: a chess club, a book club, coffee mornings, salsa dancing, chamber of commerce events, networking parties or social meetups. It's a big city, and there's an opportunity to meet people every day. Look at events and groups on Facebook, and go.

When you get there, be open. The best thing is that we all have something in common: we all live in Thailand. Everyone has a story to tell and a story to listen to, so you'll always find common ground.

For more, read staying fit in Pattaya, retiring in Pattaya and Pattaya for digital nomads.